Monday, December 27, 2010

Proud Mommy Moment

On Wednesday last week, as we were leaving church, my oldest asked if he could invite his best friend (we'll call him J) for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day to spend with our family. Of course I said yes. Christan then explained the reasons why and I don't want to air J's "dirty laundry" but I'll just say he's never really had a Christmas and it's not because of a "religious thing". Christian babysat a lot last week and so had quite a bit of money. He went Thursday after he was done babysitting and spent ALL his money on J. Of course I gave him money and told him to pick out something J would like from me and Brice. The next day (Friday) I went and got his stocking stuffers (one of which was a Bible). At an age when Christian could have saved his money for a car, car insurance, or just simply spent it on himself, he instead chose to provide a little joy for J. Christmas is not about the materialism that is often so present today. It is about God's love sent down from heaven in the form of Christ so we could have eternal life. I think Christian did a good job of showing love on Christmas morning.




Merry Merry Christmas J!

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Heavy Heart

My heart is so heavy right now.

Four kids have died this week.

Three of them in less than two days.

Two of them with heart problems.

One of them with the same problem Eli walks around with right now.

I have no words.

I know those babies/kids are in heaven in the loving arms of Jesus.

Those mommies arms are empty. Those mommies now have the heavy burden of walking around without their child while grief follows them everywhere. No more smiles. No more laughs. No more crying. No more anything.

Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths."

People who don't have a child with a heart problem don't understand that just because they do surgery doesn't mean the journey is over.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Do You Hear What I Hear?

If you're not a parent of a child with Congenital Heart Defects and Disease, the chances are not.

You don't hear the complete silence as the cardiologist listens intently to your childs heart.

You don't hear the intense beating of your own heart in anticipation of what that cardiologist has to say.

You don't hear the cardiologist telling me "be thankful for every time his subaortic stenosis hasn't returned" because it has such a HIGH rate of reoccurance. Or any number of things that are a reality for a child with CHD.

You don't hear your child cough and have the task of determining whether that cough is allergies, a cold or his valve leaking more.

You don't hear people tell you not to worry, only you're NOT worried. You are being cautious, but they would NOT understand the difference.

You don't hear of the other kiddos with heart problems similar to Eli and wonder is God trying to prepare me for what is next or am I crazy.

You don't hear God telling me things will be okay if I lean on Him.

You don't hear the peace that also comes from knowing God is in control. Knowing that when my worries and fears take hold I can put them in His loving hands and know I will get through this.